Carlton and Benigno skipped arm in arm down a well beaten path to the door of an inn, which looked to be full of merriment and young ladies ."Here we are squire! Drinks and company await!" said Carlton with much fanfare.
Benigno opened the door for his friend, removing his hat and giving a deep bow. Carlton passed through the door with his head held high, Benigno right behind. Both of them however missing the brown paper sign tacked to the door with the words "Ladies Only" scratch across with an aged quill.
"Hi Ho ladies! A drink for me and my Spanish friend here! Gin and tonics might do the trick I should say!" Carlton threw his coat tails out as he perched himself upon the stool sliding a note across the splintering bar.
His hand almost reached the end of the plank when he felt the note curling up before his dainty fingers. Sliding his glance down his frilly sleeve he noticed a large bowie knife, newly sharpened and standing in the center of his bill. At this point it became impossible not to notice a rather rough looking lady, several teeth shy from a smile, glaring at him from only inches away.
"Who invited you to my party?" She whispered into Carlton's ear, Benigno now slowly edging toward the door.
"I did not realize an invitation was in order, madam." Carlton calmly replied.
"Can't you not see there is a party afoot? There be music, dancing, and general merriment abound, be there not!" Her voice now growing sharp. Her breath, a combination of whiskey and tooth decay singed our hero's mustache. Carlton allowed one eye to survey the room, the other firmly planted on the razor sharp knife pressing against his well manicured fingernail.
The collection of ladies was a motley crew indeed. They were clad in the sort of tattered rags that would embarrass a beggar. There were not enough teeth, eyes and limbs to be evenly distributed among the lot, and Benigno would be jealous of at least two of the mustaches.
"Ummm...you ladies do seem to be engaged in a gathering of some sort" Carlton's words now quivering with a degree of fear.
"OH? And what sort of gathering do ye think that may be, friend?" She said, turning her gaze to Benigno, now pressed against the door with his hand on the knob.
"Well! Let's see now!" Carlton was regaining his strength.
"Charm School reunion?"
"Christian housewives biweekly knitting circle?
"Oh! I've got it! Annual meeting of the Miss Countryside beauty pageant runners up!" Suddenly Carlton leapt to his feet smacking the knife from the hags hand. It whistled through the air and landed squarely between Benigno's legs.
"Go you fool!" Carlton yelled, and Benigo, regaining his composure, slid through the barely opened door, Carlton right behind. The two ran down the dirt path hats in hand.
"Know any other taverns in the area?" Benigno asked.
"Just one, but it's a little rough." said Carlton.
Tune in next time for the shocking conclusion.
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